Saturday, June 30, 2007

My Burfday

Yesterday, 29 June 2007, was the most memorable event that happened to me throughout my 17 years on earth. Though it wasn't a full blast party filled with activities, it was awesome. Note: Please bear with the long long post.

School was normal. Wishes and everything. I felt kind of moody and couldn't wait for school to be over 'cause I looked forward to band practice in the afternoon. It finally arrived and I enjoyed singing (I was scared at first 'cause of the many eyes around me but I slowly got used to it) til I had very little energy left. Man I hope I'm that brave when I perform on stage. Anyway, I had my first stolen cake! Naughty little HH stole a piece of her friend's birthday cake and brought it to me. Mmm... choc!^^ I also had my first birthday prezzie for the day! It's a cute little bear from my pet sis.

Function of the bear: To squish when angry.

When practice finished, I went down, put my 20cents into the pay phone, dialed my house number..... and heard an engaged tone. Dang. Pressed that FOC button, called my mom's cell and... "The number you have dialed...". What the... it ate my money! Waited a few minutes and tried again. Same result. So poor little birthday girl had to walk home *sob sob*. I had company, so it's OK. The weather was really hot though. Felt like ice melting under the fire's energy!


Hey that car looks familiar... I wonder if it's that small goat that was supposed to visit me this afternoon...~

Yes! I've reached my neighbourhood. I couldn't wait to shower. Was bathed in my own sweat. Walk walk walk, hey! It's that same car again! But it's going away from me. Hmm... Anyway, once I reached home my mom was like, "Who fetched you home?... Why didn't you call me?... Ah? Ya la your auntie also said can't call the house phone. Why ah?... My phone something wrong la... Credit don't have... blablabla." A nice cold shower washed away my feelings of unfairness at the irony of TWO phones being engaged and that I had to walk home.

Then a small little goat came to my doorstep, with a big present behind his back. And he forced me to make him a drink. Mom wanted to go out so she asked me to close the door. How kind of him, he offered to close it for me. Mom forgot something, came back in and went out and asked me to close back the door. Without even realising it, I took the Ribena bottle together with me like a crab that can't let go what it's holding, and reached for the gate button. Then I heard a squeal.

The goat asked me how to open back the gate so *press* *gate opens* and ... WHOA! What came pouring in was Pau, Von, CL, Karen, Prause, and %^$@#OMG! CHIPMUNK! *blink blink* and also cake!

Choc! Yum...^^

Then came the birthday song... Felt so shy... Didn't dare look anyone in the eye. XD. Now to open that big present the goat brought... Guess what is it?


Will be putting up a clearer pic of my prezzies in friendster =) The rest of the day was spent with the goat. It was so relaxing. Even my neighbours didn't make noise like they usually do.

Then came night and my bro took me out for dinner in an Italian restaurant nearby. Ate til so full >.< But I was happy to see my dad enjoying his meal hehe... I slept early yesterday. Appreciate every moment. Thanks to all the names mentioned here. You made my day <3 *Big Hugs*

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Truth or Dare

Truth or dare?


I dare you to...

Freak! I can't believe this game doesn't have a quit option. If someone dares to you murder one person would you do it?!

And why the heck is this Kenangan Terindah word repeating itself today? In a SONG? It's a freaking song! And it's freaking nice. And sad. Nevermind. It didn't get me sad.

Why am I so edgy anyway? Nothing should bother me. Nothing.

Crap. I don't even know what I'm saying. Oh well, karma does everything.

EDIT: Nevermind. All of a sudden I'm calm.

EDIT2: I'm not calm.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

I'm Not Worth Your Affections

I had this horrible dream... and when I woke up I had this horrible surprise... And now I'm having a horrible moment. All of it involves different people but tied to one. This is one person I don't wanna see go. OK, now insecurity kicks in. Someone save me.

Hey.. reply my message lah... You just disappeared suddenly >.<

EDIT: Ok well... just forget everything. Insecurity makes people do weird things. Like posting this post =="

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Horoscope: Cancer Woman

It's like 90% accurate so sooome things might not be true. It's almost there though.


When she is in love, she will act both ways. First, shy and polite; trembling to be near you. Second, attached to you like glue and trying to be with you all the time. She will try to go home with you after work, or have every lunch with you. It is O.K. if you like her too, but if it is not the case, you will feel very uncomfortable.

She hates to be talked about or gossiped by someone else. If she knows, she will be very hurt. In nature she is a shy type, except she has been influenced by some other Zodiac. She is not a brave or daring type, so if you like her then you better be the one who start first. She will not accept her true feeling, so if you like her you better tell her first.

She is like a musical note; always change in tunes. So one minute she can be funny and cheerful, and one minute she can be sad and depressed. Other people may think of her as "Over-acting", or "Over-reacting".

When she is depressed, she will go out and look for things to make it up. She
loves money, and thinks of having "Money" as "Happy", but not as "God". She will not look down at you if you do not have a lot of money, but she will help you make money, save money. She is not an extravagant person and sometimes will tell you not to buy her expensive and useless gifts.

She is the type who enjoys a long and quiet walk. A cancer woman is also influenced by the "moon", so under the moon light she will be a fascinating woman.

She has a constant fear for many things. She fears of not being smart enough, not pretty enough. Even if she is not fat, she will not be satisfied. Assuring her of her looks would help, because she can change mood 4 times a day.

She is not stingy, but you will not surprise if you see she collecting old or broken junks. She sees that everything are useful to her. She will find a way to re-use it again some day. She is not a jealous type, but possessive.

The best part of her is that she will sacrifice everything for her love one with no limit. Don't leave her in times of troubles, she will never forget it. She is not a weak type, even she looks like one. Example, if you argue with her, she might cry her heart out. Once you left, she will wipe her tears and start cleaning up her apartment normally.

She is a very careful mother and will look after her kids every step of the
way. If she is a mother of your children, you are at ease, but if she is your mother-in-law, you are in pain. Not to worry, this type of mother-in-law will not let her own daughter be an "Old maid".

She could be moody and argue with you about many little things like other women, but she will always wait and want to take care of you. If you argue with her and disappear a few days, she will be waiting for you, but not for long O.K. This kind of testing is risky, try not to do it.

The Cancer woman needs 2 things to be happy about which are "Work" and "Love". She can be live in a dusty house, but she can not live in that same house with no Love.

Wanna know yours? CLICK!. P.S: I don't know if non-members can read that page...

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Drama, Drama, Drama

Whoever thinks those things, scenes and fights you see on TV or dramas doesn't happen in real life has got to be living under a shell. Those things happen alright. And when you do go through it, you wouldn't be thinking it's so cliche. You would actually be going through this whirlpool of emotions with many choices to make. And these real life situations can be as complicated and scandalous as all the top TV dramas put together!

Take for example a family. You have the dad, the mom, the children, and maybe even Rover or little Muffin. Steady income on both the dad and mom, children doing well in school, and the pets are well taken care off. Then, all of a sudden, you find either the dad or mom is cheating on the other or the children are involved in gangsterism or drug abuse, or both, or some member in the family, out of pure stress and craziness, kills Rover or small little Muffin who had its claws cut. And then out comes another person who says, "I'm your real mother." Then the kids go, "Whaaa?"

No, not talking 'bout anything related to me, mind you. Just giving an example that life can be as complicated as that. Besides, those drama ideas have to come from somewhere. And it will always be cliche.

My life is filled with drama.

Bittersweet Moments

Alright, who here knows what taste it's like when you eat beetroot and banana together? Something bitter and sweet? That's right. I don't know either XD. But I'm betting it'll feel like a jumble of taste. Is that even a correct sentence? Well, don't bother. My point is I feel like one jumble too. How nice it would be if life could have this kind of remote so that I could stop, rewind or fast forward and play right when things aren't going so great. Hmm.... but that wouldn't be too good either. Look what happened to Adam Sandler's character when he got it! Haha! By the way, did you guys watch that show? Hilarious!

Ugh... I'm so sleepy. I'll come back and post later... maybe with more content than this short paragraph of rubbish.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Love And Obsession

This is a little something I came up with while praying in church (bad me, mind wondering while praying). It's not edited or checked to I hope it has very few errors. I might change it... when I feel like it. Haha. Other than that, enjoy. =)

For months I have gotten to know you and I slowly fell in love. My heart, which I kept so guarded, was taken away from its jail and landed up in your palms. But we were too young to start, we both knew it. So we danced around each other instead, randomly playing with each other's feelings. Yet we got closer. And one day I asked you out.

Our first date, something I will never forget. How can I when I loved you terribly so? I have been meaning to ask you to be mine for sometime. However, my fear overtook me and stopped me from doing so. And that day… that day I finally found courage to help me. You said you would think about it. My hope fell. Were you thinking of rejecting me? Why do you have to think if you love me so? For those few days, I was restless, silently praying for the best. I tried to study your actions but that only filled my head with more worries. Oh Samantha, the day you said yes I was so relieved! And I was overjoyed.

This love for you grew, Samantha. It grew and I did not care. Did not see where this would go, did not think about it. All I knew is that I was happy and I felt lucky having you. For years I have waited for you, Samantha. And I finally have you. The arguments that came, I did not pay much heed. After all, what kind of relationship does not have arguments or disagreements? I knew more about you, your talents, your fears, your thinking. I started thinking like you too. I started to be one with you. I did not know how this love would turn out, Samantha.

That day when we broke up over a stupid argument was the day that shattered me. It shattered us both. We did not even get a few things straight. You left with my heart and I was left with a head full of questions. My veins were then filled with anger and depression. Wasn't I good enough? Shouldn't I have done that? Perhaps I could have stopped the break up. Why did I only think about it when everything is over? And you even filled me with the hope that maybe we could get back together again. I was so ready for it. I waited for you like waiting for rain in the desert. My love for you was not broken yet.

Before I realised it, my love turned into obsession over you. You seemed to be doing better than me, Sam. I followed the news about you. I knew where you went, I read about your growing talents. How you became a model to how you were growing as a singer. Your pictures are amazing and your songs are great. I knew your talents would get you far someday. I was happy when you called to ask me how I was. Despite your busy schedule you did not fail to know about your old flame. At that time I couldn't help thinking, "Am I still your flame?"

Unfortunately you disappointed me again and again. I found that you had so many fans, so many suitors, and so many admirers. What am I compared to them? When I needed you, you weren't there. You were busy with your work; practically married to it. And like a foolish man waiting for water to fall from the sky in the desert instead of looking for it, I was slowly dying of thirst.

One day I finally decided I can't do this to myself any longer. I tried to break my habit; my obsession with you. And like a blind man who had just gotten new eyes, I slowly adjusted to my surroundings; my life without you, without being blinded anymore. No doubt, I still look forward to hearing your voice, to seeing your face, to have you smile at me, but I began to let those go, one by one. Obsession is a hard thing to get over.

Then I met her. She makes me smile again, Sam. I'm even laughing for real! You can't imagine how free I feel, released from your binding chains. It feels like I have been underwater for too long and am now taking my first breath of fresh air. She is nothing like you. Not as pretty as you, but I find her beautiful. Not as talented as you, but I can see something growing.

"Come out and spend time with me, Jake."

Why do you want to patch things up now? Of course I don't feel for her what I felt for you. Not yet anyway. Don't look at me that way, Sam. I am happy now and I am cured off my blindness. Or so I think. There will always be this small space for you in my heart. But other than that, I am moving on. Would a blind man go back to being blind again, Sam?

I am running ahead in this race and I wish you well.