My Thoughts On 2007

2007. In this year, I'll be 17. In this year, I'll be facing my SPM and a whole different thing before and after it. I feel that 2007 could be really scary. For one, lets start with SPM. My parents have hopes in me, I know, and it'll be kind of bad to disappoint them. They probably expect me to make them proud and I want to do that. I'd love to. But what's actually scary would be that I will not be able to do it. I will not be able to make them proud. What if I failed a subject? What if I don't score an A? This wouldn't make my parents proud but it would make them feel the total opposite!

After SPM, I would like to go work. Part time, of course. And then there's college to think of. It's kind of freaky to think that what you choose from here, would effect your future. I mean, what if you made the wrong choice? What if you found out that there are other stuff worth learning about and that you're in the wrong line? Furthermore, I'm still thinking on what to do. Those dreams I have, I'm afraid that it would just stay a dream. I mean, how can a cowardly, ordinary girl like me achieve such big dreams to be a concert pianist, or a singer or an actress? It's really impossible when I look at it this way. It's almost laughable. And all the friends I've come to know and love, they would be going after their dreams too and maybe we would loose contact of each other.

Also of my thoughts on this year, I would loose a friend. I would loose someone I really care about (well, I think I do care about). That would be the guy who got stuck in my head. Since we broke up, talking with each other seemed so weird. At first I cannot accept it but when I try, he doesn't seem to be normal with me. Like the fact that he only says 'Hi' to me in school when we pass by each other or just give a short smile. But when there's no one around and it's at night, smsing seem to be no problem at all. I've got advice from a couple of people to just forget it and that I'm 'Gamed Over/No Hope'. OK, so I won't be getting back with him. But what about our friendship? Is that gone too? Is his word of still being 'best friends' would just stay words? It would really suck if that happens.

I'm not saying that all that I said would happen, I'm saying that there is a big possibility it will happen. I can't predict my future. No one can predict theirs. Even if they go to some hoohaa psychic to figure out their future, I believe the result wouldn't be 100% true. Because the future is really flexible. The way you act and the choices you make, effects every bit of your future. For example, I'm sitting here. I'd probably be stuck staring at the screen through the night if I find something interesting to play. But if I get up and find something else to do, like my homework, I'd probably not touch the computer again considering how tired my head feels like. Haha.
Frankly speaking, this is just one small example. Might not be good, might give you a clear picture about what I'm talking about but for you to really understand these thoughts is to come across them yourself. So my thoughts for 2007: I fear it. But I know one thing and I should really keep this in mind; I can do anything through Him who gives me strength.